How well do you take care of yourself from a social or emotional standpoint? I know that our husbands are our best friends but they do not need to be our only source for social interaction. I talked briefly about the positive effects friendship can provide in “Orgasm, Chocolate and Friends…Oh My!!!” I am now referring to having friends as a support system.
I was thinking about how important friendships are to children. Young children will even pal around with a pet, stuffed animal or have imaginary friends. In our teen years our friends have a big influence over the type of personality we develop. As we get married many women lose their identity. Sometimes we get ultra focused on pleasing our husband that we lose sight of the things we enjoyed before we were married. I am not saying that you should be hanging out in clubs with your girlfriends if that’s what you did with them prior to being married. You can easily connect with a friend on a short walk or over a cup of coffee. All you really need is one good friend. Quality is much more important than quantity. It is great to know that I have friends with whom I can laugh, cry, pray with, vent to or get advice from. My friends are some of my biggest fans as well as my toughest critics and I know it is because they love me unconditionally.
It is a known fact that friendships can lower blood pressure, heart rates, cholesterol and stress. Have you ever become so consumed in an activity with a friend that issues that had been hanging over your head suddenly took a back burner for a bit? It is a great feeling to be able to pray or laugh with a friend when times are tough.
In the past I have become so consumed with trying to be a good wife and a good mother that I lose my sense of self. While it’s true that I am a wife as well as a mother, I am also my own person. It is so important to have interests outside marriage. In the long run they enrich the quality of my marriage. Plus, my husband fell in love with that person so why would I ever want to get rid of her?
Oh man have I had a rough week! I thought I had a yeast infection. I get maybe one every two years. The first day of discomfort was kind of strange. I kept wondering if I was getting an infection. The second day the itching was worse, but everything looked normal (no weird discharge or anything). After the third day of really bad itching, I broke down and took my oral RX that I had left over from last year. I remembered that it could take a couple of days to work, but after a couple of days I was no better. So I took another one and waited. Then when I got into the shower one night I had a startling realization…
Let me start by saying that I have extremely sensitive skin. I have eczema and have to use special soap that costs nearly $6 per bar. I also cannot use any type of bath oils, bath beads, bubble bath, etc., because if I do I will get a UTI, guaranteed. I’ve learned over the years what I can and can’t use, and I usually stick with the things that I know are okay for me.
Well, the grocery store was out of my regular Skintimates shave gel last weekend, so I picked up some Gillette Satin Care. I didn’t really think anything about it. It was a vanilla scented kind and I love vanilla. I used it twice to shave down there. It wasn’t until I was about to use it a third time, that my eyes were suddenly opened…I WAS ALLERGIC TO THE NEW SHAVE GEL! Why did I not realize that before? So I just washed myself with my nice expensive soap, and I rinsed off real good with hot water. I did this again a few times over the next two days, and then my symptoms went away.
So I wasted a perfectly good prescription all because I was allergic to the shave gel. I really should have known better. It’s very frustrating to be so ultra sensitive to so many different things. I even have to use special laundry detergent (dye free, fragrance free, etc.). My mother is the same way, and I’m already seeing the same issues in my children.
I guess this was mainly written as a vent. I assume there are other women out there who have skin issues like I do, but my girlfriends don’t seem to battle with these issues. I thought that maybe some of you out there may be able to relate to this though…
Your mission this week is take more time to kiss when you are home together. Be intentional about giving kisses when you greet and say goodbye. Take time to stop what you are doing to give unexpected kisses and let some of those kisses linger that would usually be quick ones. Just enjoy kissing a little more than normal this week.