This week, give your hubby something to anticipate…. text him a picture of a sexy negligee on your bed with a note that says later” or whisper to him as he goes out the door “tonight I’m going to ______ with you”…. Give him something to think about all day and follow through!!
I have noticed that we have many positions that work well if you happen to own bed risers so I decided to write on up for those lower surfaces. Now this lower surface can be a couch, bed, or table. This position is very similar to Position #11: The Standing T.
To get into position lay flat on your back and move as close as possible to the edge of whatever surface you are using. Have your husband kneel at the side of the bed, table or couch, and hopefully everything lines up for penetration. If you are laying on a very low surface you can use some pillows to prop yourself up.
Pros: ~ you are able to get some great leverage from the floor.
~ Clitoris is easily assessable for stimulation.
Con: ~ a long session could hurt your husband’s knees.
It may surprise you that although the CN girls are all focused on loving our husbands well and building deep intimacy in our marriages, some of us still sometimes have trouble keeping our drive up. I am one of them. If I get distracted because life gets busy or if I expend too much energy on other things, it is easy for me to find myself struggling with a lower drive. And in my marriage my husband is the same way. If he is under a lot of stress or distracted by life he also finds that his drive is lower.
The best trick I have learned for changing the downward spiral in sex drive to an upward spiral is to make it a priority to think sex. Assuming that my husband is loving me well, because this is not as easy if I am feeling unloved, sometimes sexual arousal begins with a choice. A choice to think about your husband in a sexual way. If you find yourself in a place of apathy towards sex it really helps to focus your mind on sex with your husband. You might be going through your day caring for your kids and taking care of life, but if you take a moment to think ahead to the evening when you have the house or your room to yourself it can really help. Think about snuggling on the couch to watch TV or however you tend to spend your evenings at home and take it a step further to mentally choose that once you are there you are going to be an active participant in whatever happens.
After you have made this choice, it’s a really good idea to communicate what you are thinking to your husband so he can be involved in meeting you where you are at and you can journey through this mental foreplay together. Email, text or call him and let him know that you are looking forward to being with him in the evening. He’ll enjoy being involved in the process.
It may not sound as romantic as being swept away in emotional attraction, but if the alternative is continuing to allow yourself to be satisfied with less sex than is healthy for your marriage, thinking sex is a really good way to refocus you on sexual intimacy.