OK, you are probably thinking that I came up with the name Cupid’s Arrow just in time for Valentine’s Day and I guess you are right but it is pretty fitting. This is a woman on top position that allows fantastic G-spot as well as clitoral stimulation but instead of you controlling all the movements, it is your husband who will be determining the depth. I’m sure he will not mind getting some specific directions from you if needed. Just yell out your commands to him to go faster or slower and he will be more than happy to please you. The last time we did this position I told my husband he was lucky I didn’t drool on him. Not the loveliest image but I’m telling you, it’s that good!!
Have your husband lay flat on his back while you straddle him like a typical cowgirl position. Support your weight on your knees (which should be on either side of him) and lean forward so that you can rest your weight on your elbows. Make sure you are forward enough so that your clitoris is being stimulated by rubbing on him. Have him bend his legs slightly at the knees so that he has leverage to do his thrusting. Your husband will have freedom to thrust as fast or as slow as he wants. With each thrust you should also be getting stimulation on your clitoris and his “arrow” should be hitting your G-spot. The results are mind blowing orgasms.
Pros: ~ Multiple types of stimulation all at the same time.
~ Coordination galore is not needed. (Anyone can do it.)
~Face to face contact.
Cons: ~ I can’t think of any. Well, I guess you could run into that drooling scenario but my husband told me that he could care less if it did happen. Truth be told, I think it would make him feel pretty good now that I think about it.
Thanks for the tip. I’m so glad I found you again. I had found your last site when you had already stopped posting. I went on several times to read pretty much everything and then forgot about it. It wasn’t until yesterday while I was doing some searches that I came upon the old site and there was the link to here…yay! I can’t tell you how much you’ve helped us. We started out our marriage hot and heavy (like most), but over the years too many things crept in to cause shame. We had times over the last 24 yrs of marriage where things picked up again for us only for it to fall apart time and time again. We realized one day it was only when we were between churches (hubby coaches so we’ve moved around a lot) that things got good. As much as we’ve tried, we have never found a church that doesn’t start bringing up what shouldn’t happen in the bedroom. We’ve been told: no anal sex (because that means he’s gay), no oral sex (gay), no toys (gay, again), no masturbating, (he’ll get a porn addiction and wife becomes a lesbian), no bondage of any kind (means he’ll start beating you), no cowgirl style (means the wife usurps her husband’s authority as head of household). Oh, and no toe sucking…I kid you not…this was at a women’s retreat. The Pastor’s wife said it was because he would develop a fetish and that could lead to cross-dressing. Now, tell a strong heterosexual man (whose in a loving, monogamous marriage) and who truly loves the Lord that anything he tries to do sexually with his wife can lead to being gay and watch that man run for the hills. Even after hearing all this ridiculousness over the years we realized how little by little those words (seeds) worked their unholy magic in our hearts and caused us to withdraw. You don’t even know it’s happening until it’s too late. Words are powerful. God spoke everything into existence so our words, too, have the power to build up or tear down.
Trust me, you’ve helped. Thank you for all you do. We’ve been able to take all that garbage and live our lives differently. We celebrated 24 years yesterday and we’ve only just begun.
I about choked on my coffee over the toe sucking rule. Seriously? Nevermind the fact that the thought of putting my husbands toes in my mouth makes me want to throw up.
But seriously, I have been in church all my life, and have never ever encountered a church that takes the liberty to tell married couples what they can and cannot do in bed. Are you seeking churches within a particular denomination? I’m honestly speechless at these claims.
I guess you have 2 options.. either politely ignore any pulpit policing of marital bedroom activities, or keep looking until you find a church that isn’t quite so paranoid of couples enjoying sex. Believe me, not every church holds such legalistic, narrow views or marital intimacy.
pssht! My husband loves when I climb on top cowgirl style. No usurping his authority here!
First, Thank you, Monogabliss and CN for helping me to finally break free from years of suffering due to lack of sex drive. I was sexually abused as a young child, exposed to pornagraphy throughout childhood, and was promiscuous in high school and college, all while being raised in a religious home. I have been married to a wonderful man for nearly 20 years. He has suffered because of my guilt and lack of drive. Reading this web site and CN has helped in my recovery, and my mate is a much happier man.
Over the last two decades, I have sought help through counseling, self-help publications, and the church. The last of these did more harm than good. Never again will I bare my soul to another person in the church. I have come to realize that religion is frequently used by the devil to destroy marriages and to make innocent souls feel guilty about that which is not their fault.
Don’t get me wrong, religion is supposed to bring us closer to God, but it can be used for the opposite purpose by dark powers who use well-meaning Christians. What each of us needs is a personal relationship with God and to realize just how much we are loved and cherished just the way we are. Yes, God expects us to grow more in love, so we will end up changing, but we don’t have to change first before God will love us.
Once we realize how lovable we really are to God, then true healing is possible. Once I was able to accept God’s unconditional love, then I was able to see just how much my husband loves me, as imperfect as I am. Once I realized that I am truly lovable, I saw what a great mate I had been given, and I truly could love him. If you can’t accept love, then you certainly can’t give it.
With regards to what is OK, I have come to believe that whatever brings you closer to God (through the spouse that He gave you) is good. Anything that leads you away from Him is not good for you. But we also have to forgive ourselves when we make mistakes, ask for forgiveness, accept that forgiveness, and keep loving. Then, we will truly know that we are free! (And, boy, does freedom feel great!!)
I am so sorry that your experience with seeking help from the church was so negative. Here on Monogabliss, I try VERY hard to allow God’s word to speak through my work. Keep in mind that churches are just full of sinners… and we all sin and fall short of the glory of God…. I hope you stay and contribute here. You definitely have my ears and my heart on your side.
Thank you! I have found much healing through God’s Word, and I know the Holy Spirit speaks through the scriptures to us. I guess what I meant is that some in the church are so bent on getting a point across or have a preconceived notion about sex, that they don’t listen to the what the Holy Spirit is really telling us through God’s Word. I’m not dissing the church, just the misuse of religion.
I am so happy to be here. God bless you!
About this position – my husband LOVED it! It did nothing for me (no clitoral stimulation), but the sensations he experienced were excellent!