Archive | February 2012

Chapter 6: Lord, Show Me How to Take Control of My Mind

I could so relate to Stormie’s opening vignette in this chapter…. there have been times where I could not understand why I was so down.  There was absolutely no reason for me to be down, and I seriously thought I needed to call my doctor to see if my antidepressant needed to be increased.   It wasn’t until I was on Facebook, and I just all of the sudden  got into one of my Youtube kicks…. I started posting praise songs left and right.   Praise You in this Storm, Who Am I, East to West , Grace Like Rain, Lead Me to the Cross… one after another, these songs came to mind.  I sang them as a posted them on Facebook, all of the sudden my mood changed.   I was praising God and it chased Satan away.   He had stolen God’s word away from me, and all these praise songs brought them right back.

I play in a classic rock band.  There are times when I get so involved in listening to those songs on Pandora, I find that I have more troubles in my life when I completely move away from worship music.  We started off doing Classic Rock/Modern Worship performances, but soon, demand was asking more for our classic rock side…. The words in some of those songs can really lead your mind down the wrong road…. and I find myself being so stuck on listening to that kind of music… but last night, God reminded me on my 4 hour + drive from my parents house to home, that I needed to spend that time with him…. so on Pandora, I plugged into my Christian contemporary station and listened to that most of the way home.   It really lifted me up after the reason I went to see my parents…. both are having health issues and I feel so far away from them.   But I refused to entertain the vision Satan was trying to give me… “what a bad daughter you are for not being there for your parents….”,  “why aren’t you doing anything to help them.”  “You are too involved in your own life to even care about theirs…”     I choose to focus on the reason for this season in my life…. God has a plan for every one of us.  His will be done, not mine.

When Satan camps out in your mind, what do you do to keep him at bay and run him off?

Throwback Thursdays: “Oh, Yes, Baby! Don’t Stop!”

When you are intimate with your husband, are you vocal about it? Are you a screamer? A shouter? Or are you one of the more quiet ones? For me, I guess it depends on my mood, though I really have come to love being loud.

Sometimes I have to be quiet. When it’s the middle of the day and the kids are wide-awake, I know I can’t really let loose. Sometimes that adds to it. Knowing that I can’t be heard. There are also times that I am quiet and don’t realize it. When I’m concentrating really hard on the sensations my body is feeling, I tend to be quieter. Sometimes I’m thinking very specific things in my mind, and in those times I’m not very vocal either. But I really do like making noise. And I’ve come to realize that my husband likes it too!

Moaning and groaning is sometimes involuntary. When you are making out with your husband, and things are feeling good, moaning is a way of giving some positive verbal cues. It says: I’m happy and this feels so good! Groaning during oral sex can heighten the mood as well.

Heavy Breathing is another thing that lets our husbands know that we are feeling fine! My husband can tell when I’m approaching orgasm, just from subtle breathing changes that he detects in me. I don’t even realize that I do it, but he says it’s unmistakable. I think we women would probably notice the same thing in our husbands if we watched for it.

Sexy talk is a wonderful way to raise the passion level. It doesn’t have to be words that you are uncomfortable with, you can just say what you are thinking in your mind: “deeper baby,” “harder,” “oh yes,” “don’t stop!” “Almost there,” “use your finger,” “kiss me,” “ **** me!” “I love you,” “you’re so good,” “do that again,” “you make me feel so good,” “you’re so big,” “you’re so hard,” “take me from behind,” “you’re driving me crazy,” “your tongue feels so good on me,” “you are wonderful,” “keep going,” “let me ride now!” etc. I know that we women think these things in our minds anyway. If you can bring yourself to say them aloud during your intimate times, your husband will probably appreciate it. It will be really good affirmation for him, and his confidence will go up if he knows that he’s pleasing you! Hearing you talk sexy to him will also help his arousal level skyrocket!

If you and your husband are both comfortable using more erotic or “dirty” words in the bedroom, then by all means, let loose! What you two say to each other is between you two and God. It is no one else’s business and it’s not for anyone else to judge. My husband and I use some very playful and erotic terms with each other, and it’s such a turn on. He knows that I like hearing him tell me specifically what he’s going to do to me, and how he’s going to do it. So in turn, I also talk to him using the terms and descriptions that I KNOW turn him on.

Occasionally, when the kids are in bed (or gone) I’ll allow myself to get louder. It’s nice to be able to let out a yell or scream as orgasm hits. What a rush that is! I think it’s exhilarating for our husbands to hear us abandon ourselves like that too. It gives them a sense of accomplishment, knowing that they helped give us such pleasure.

Think about how vocal you are during sex. Are you quiet more times than not? Maybe it’s time to think about spicing things up by moaning and talking more! And you know what? I have found that talking and moaning and trying to turn my husband on with my words also has an effect on me. I like hearing myself talk naughty. My own arousal goes up when I’m vocal. So it’s a win-win situation!

Get vocal ladies, and let your husband KNOW how much you enjoy making love to him!

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Spicy Getaways!

Sometimes we just need to get away to recharge our sexual batteries. There are so many places that an overnight stay or a vacation or even just a daytime excursion can really do us good.

It’s been a long time since my hubby and I have been away together, but the overnight stay we had away in a secluded cabin was such an awesome time to rejuvenate our sex life and celebrate my sexual awakening. We got to experiment with some dreams I would have never had imagined would be fulfilled, and created some memories that will last a lifetime. How long has it been since you have been away with your spouse? Are you tied down with kids and it is hard to get away? If you can get Gramma to babysit or swap babysitting with a friend or neighbor, it is so very important to your sex life and your marriage to make some alone time for you and your spouse. Sex in a hot tub is great….video tape the event so you can go back and watch your own *home movies* of your experience, take a movie you’ve both been wanting to see and lounge in his arms in front of a roaring fire. Have breakfast in bed and him for dessert. Shower together. Take a stroll in the woods, along the seashore or in a park. Make love under the moonlight. Just enjoy that precious time with him and the gift that God gave you in your husband. We run in such a go go go world and we need to recharge those batteries in our marriage relationship just as much if not more than other things we do in our daily lives.

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